When we showed up at SUNY Geneseo College the other day, the student hospitatlity crew had left us two disposable cameras and this note in the dressing room:
Is there a more passive-aggressive way to ask the band to take pictures of themselves doing dick tricks than this? I mean, why not just include an itemized list in the note specifying which band member you’d like to see doing which dick trick? Please enjoy these disposable cameras as you see fit, but make sure Ryan does “the baby bird,” Adam gives us “the hamburger,” Joe tries out “the loch ness monster,” and Brian delivers his world famous “chewing gum on my seat!” — I mean, could they be more obvious? Why not just leave a toothbrush there next to the disposable cameras so we don’t have to ruin one of our own to get the picture of it stuck in our butt cheeks?
Alas, to give them what they wanted would have been too easy. They received no pictures of our genitalia twisted about to take on the shape of a “cornish game hen.” They received no “didgeridoos.” After all, we’re a family band, and this a family road journal. We did give them some photos of Ryan removing the staples from Adam’s head though: